WorldView Academy 2008 Summary

I just came back from a week at WorldView Academy. It was a wonderful learning experience. Full of joyful times. ;-)

We spent 25 hours listening to lectures on worldviews, leadership and apologetics. We didn't go to bed until 11:30 or 12:30 and had to get up between 7 and 7:30 every day. First thing after showers (which had to be super quick) we went out for our quiet half hour devotion time. Meal times were fun, because a bunch of the guys had this competition of which of them could take the most trays from the tables. The guys also held all the doors open for us (*applauds the guys*). We had some free time on Monday and Tuesday afternoon during which I got to call home, play mafia and sing with some people and a guy who brought his guitar.On Thursday we had the color team relay that my team came dead last in. Green team won the sought after Spamley Cup complete with an elaborate presentation ceremony on Thursday night, in which Indiana Jones defeated Darth Vador, Sauron, and the Persians. There was also a WVA staff fashion show on Tuesday.

My roommate and all the girls in my suite/small group were wonderful. I had an awesome time laughing and engaging in deep conversations with them.

The highlight of the week, the reason I wanted to go, was the witnessing time on Wednesday. We went into the down town in groups of three and just started conversations with people about what they thought happened when they die. We had some great discussion. I was in a group with my roommate and another friend from my area. We just talked about life after death with these people, eventually telling them about Christ, telling them that He's the only way to be forgiven so we can go to heaven. Out of the whole group of about a hundred kids, I think five people trusted Christ that day. The three of us were all first-timers, but it still went really well.

Evangelizing there was probably one of the scariest, if not the scariest, thing I have ever done. It was wonderful though. At the time, I completely got lost in it and forgot myself like I never have. I was just focused on the other person and God and everything else was pushed from m mind. Now, I feel so much more equipped to share the gospel with my unsaved family members, along with other people I meet, know and interact with. It is the best skill I have ever been taught and I plan to use it always.

I met lots of nice people and spent time with old friends too. They were all so awesome!

I missed my family ever so much though. I was so homesick the first three days that I cried for a while in bed before I could fall asleep. God restored my spirits though, thankfully. My wonderful family sent me lots of stuff. I got two emails, three pictures, two letters and three cards. I love my family!

I'm sure I'm leaving lots out, but to summarize what I thought about the whole thing... I signed up for next year.

Conversation With Elliott

(Sorry for the long delay.)

Yesterday, my little brother, Elliott, asked me to eat lunch with him. During the meal, the following conversation occurred:

Elliott: (singing) "If a squash can make you smile...have we got a show for you! Beggie Tales (that's VeggieTales if you didn't get that), Beggie Tales, Beggie Tales, Beggie Tales."

Me: "Good job, Elliott."

Elliott: "I sang that song for you. That's yours and my song."

Me: "Aww, thank you. That's so nice."

Elliott: "Ninny (that's his nickname for me), when you grow up, you should be Larry."

Me: "Elliott, I can't be Larry! I'm not a cucumber. I'm a girl."

Elliott: "And when I grow up, I'll be a girl too?"

Me: "No, silly. You'll be a man like Dad."

Elliott: "I can't be a man. I have to play with toys."

Me: "When you get married and have babies, you can play toys with them."

Elliott: "I'll have to always play with baby toys?"

Me: "No, they'll grow big like you. When you're a man you can mow the lawn with the big mower like Dad and drive trucks and cars."

Elliott: "No, I can't. I can't know how to drive."

A lot more confusion followed concerning genders and his future ability to do things that he can't do now.

I hope that made you laugh.

Spring Photos!

In case you all didn't notice, spring is in full bloom. If you did notice, we should have talked about it by now, because it is definitely newsworthy. God's creation completely amazes me. I am so grateful that He deemed me worthy to walk through it.

My Other Blog

For those of you who don't know that I have another blog, I have another blog! It has some more serious, but less personal writings of mine. The reason why I'm bringing it to your attention now is because I just put up some of my notes from the Rebelution conference last year. They're not amazing, but anything to do with the Rebelution is cool.

I Trace The Rainbow Through The Rain...

These words to the song we sang yesterday just gave me shivers, they're so amazing.

O Love that wilt not let me go,
I rest my weary soul in thee;
I give thee back the life I owe,
That in thine ocean depths its flow
May richer, fuller be.

O light that foll’west all my way,
I yield my flick’ring torch to thee;
My heart restores its borrowed ray,
That in thy sunshine’s blaze its day
May brighter, fairer be.

O Joy that seekest me through pain,
I cannot close my heart to thee;
I trace the rainbow through the rain,
And feel the promise is not vain,
That morn shall tearless be.

O Cross that liftest up my head,
I dare not ask to fly from thee;
I lay in dust life’s glory dead,
And from the ground there blossoms red
Life that shall endless be.

I wrote this out on a piece of paper about six months ago and I forgot about it until now. It seems appropriate for me to post it, since I'm feeling sort of the same way today.

Oh how failing are the things of this world. Not one steady thing under the sun is there. Friends come and they go, and come again, but alas, some are gone forever. Families are created and grow, yet so many are broken. The triumph of success is a beautiful feeling, but all too often overcame with the despair of defeat. Beauty is inexplicable pleasing, but such an eerie contrast in this world compared to the horrific and grotesque.

The time when fullness comes is a source or joy, but also springs forth guilt. What have we done in this life to have any good brought near us? Did no one see that we are unworthy of the sun, water air, oceans, sunsets, fields and mountains on this earth that we are privileged to live in? Who decided us worthy to be sisters and brothers, sons and daughters, and to have some friends that will always love and never leave us? Why are we so blessed?

This world is one of mixed emotions. With grass growing in the pavement and thorns on the roses, it is a little hard to make sense of things. The ups and downs are jarring. Nothing is steady. How can we live with this turmoil? Some days we feel we need someone, anyone to save us. Already He has come, though we cannot always feel it. Right know though, feelings don't matter. I choose to live past the impulse and rest confident in my Savior.

A Very Cool Quote

I'm very tired today, so instead of trying to come up with some jumbled thought of my own, I'll leave you with this awesome quote that I read today.

Modern technology, I suspect, far from being neutral in its effects, has more than one underlying purpose of built-in tendency: besides reducing the need for physical effort (a kind of material surrender,) it helps us avoid the need for cooperation of social flexibility (a kind of social or metaphysical surrender)... Cars, telephones, message machines, caller ID, and e-mail grant us unprecedented powers to associate with whom we want, when we want, to the degree we want, under the terms we want, finessing and filtering out those we don't want--and thin out the possibilities of social growth accordingly.

Perhaps that seems rather random to you. It's from this book, Better Off, by Eric Brende, about the problems with technology and how people can live without it. It's a really good book.

segnahC emoS

After reading Do Hard Things and listening to Leeland's song Opposite Way a million times (52 times, to be precise), I feel it's time for a change. A bigger change.

It's been a month since I turned seventeen. It's been the best month of my life; I feel I've learned to be truly happy and just take joy in being alive as a child of God. But now, I need to do something more. I'm inspired.

On Friday, I was writing down this list of people and things that inspire me and how I'd like to live in light of that. Then I was asking myself where I'd like to be in a year. I thought about it for a while. I was still thinking about it today.

I think I greatly limit myself with how much I can do. There's much to be said for day to day living, not worrying about tomorrow. But I think that the days fill up with rather meaningless things without a decent amount of looking forward to the future.

So, I'm making some changes. Nope, I'm not writing them all here now, but you'll probably find them out eventually. Some goals I may fail at, but hopefully not.

Just for starters though, I thought about reading the Bible and where I'd like to be with that in a year. I really think one time isn't enough. I've done that for four years and I'd like to move on to more. I mean, I don't have that many years on earth to read it and it makes all the difference. So my goal this time is to read it three times this year. It's entirely possible with some sacrifice of other trivial things. This is just the beginning...

Random Update

This has to be a short post, because I have to get off the computer in exactly three minutes, but I just felt like writing a short thing to all my dedicated readers.

For some reason today, the rain really made me happy. It was quite refreshing.

You know, this may be a very silly thing to write, but I really enjoyed cleaning today. I vacuumed and dusted the whole house, did some laundry and dishes, and picked up most of the rooms. It really feels good to do work like that.

So, I'm going to my cousins' tomorrow and that's going to be fun.

I really love God! He's so amazing to give me this life of peace and such blessings and I want to serve Him completely. I only wish that I did it better.

I Really Love Mustangs! And I Collect Baby Name Books, Mmhmm. Oh, and I'm Learning Piano Chords, Which Is Totally Awesome. Very Fun Life, I Lead.

I don't usually randomly write about my days but this one is an exception. Or rather, this is a random update of my life, mostly about today.

After having a delicious breakfast and reading the most important Book of all Books,* I drove my sister and a friend of ours, that lives just down the street, over to where they both babysit. This was fun, because the other girl was under 18 and she's the second person under 18 I've driven since I had my license long enough. It's very fun to be able to do things like that and help other people out. Not to mention that we had a lovely little visit on the ride over.

Then I drove straight to the Pangue's** house. They have four kids. Samantha*** is 7, Harold**** is 5, Tasha***** is 3, and Claudia****** is not yet one.
(how many people think the star thing is getting annoying at this point? just so you know, all the rest of the names are fake too)
Then the Jordon family arrived soon after. Jason is 6, Amelia is 5, Samuel is 3, and Wallie is 1. I went there to watch the kids while Mrs. Pangue and Mrs. Jordon, along with two other women organized the upstairs of the Pangue house. It was such a fun time!

I played games with the kids, brought them outside, gave them lunch, carried them around, and other fun things. While the babies napped, I played guitar outside and the other six kids clapped for me at the end of every song. So cute! :) Then they all gathered round and danced on the patio. At the end of the time there, they got their moms to come out to watch a "performance" of them doing that. All in all it was a great time. I was there for a little over five hours.

I really love doing stuff like that. The moms got to get a lot done and they were really happy to. I think it's great to help people. I really like being able to do that! I was so glad to be homeschooled and I'm so glad I can help other homeschooling mothers get stuff done.

When I came home I had a good lunch. I was really hungry.

Then my dear sister, Tatiana, wanted me to bring her to the store and Elliott decided to come too. I love driving my siblings places. It was a very hilly road and on the way back Elliott kept saying "Go fast down the hill, Ninny.*" Well, I didn't go too fast, just so you know. I am a very good driver.

Now, here I am at home. I just finished some good dinner and I did some reading and talked to my momma and chatted with a couple friends. I'm still hungry, but I'm more tired, so I think I'm going to go rest while I listen to something.

Oh, and I really love the song Jesus Lord Of Heaven, by Phil Wickham, that Kutless did. I'm just going to put the words here, because I like it so much!

Jesus, Lord of Heaven, I did not deserve
The grace that You have given and the promise of Your word

Lord, I stand in wonder of the sacrifice You made
With mercy beyond measure, my debt You freely paid

Your love is deeper than the ocean, higher than the heavens,
Reaches beyond the stars in the sky

Jesus, Your love has no bounds

* I do take showers in the morning too, but kind of is just a distraction to the post. *******
** Not their real last name
*** Not their real name
**** Not their real name
***** Not their real name
****** Not their real name
*******I think I might have checked my email too
*Okay, I'm not trying to protect my identity or anything, but that's really what Elliott calls me. Don't ask me why

Christmas Every Day

There's this guy I know, a homeschooling dad with four young kids who are ages 6, 5, 3 and 1. Talk about crazy busy. He and his wife homeschool too. So amazing. The best part is that when I asked him tonight how he's doing he said, "Every day's like Christmas in our house. We wake up early in the morning with the babies and it's like Christmas has come to the Gordon's house!" That's how I want to be. Oh, that I'd be as excited every day as I am on Christmas. :)

Pickup Truck Reflections

I was riding in my dad's pickup today (all good blog posts should start like this), listening to Casting Crowns' song Life Of Praise. I got kind of stuck at this line though: "I will love You, Lord, always, not just for the things You've done for me. And I will praise you all my days, not just for the change you made." I got to wondering how we praise God, not for something He's done, but just for who He is.

I thought about it for a while. And then it struck me. All of us have really good friends, who we are just totally impressed with. Or there are people in history, or great people now, that we cannot say enough good about. There are people I know that I just could say "You are incredible" to, every time I saw them. This is how it should be with God. He receive the same adoration from us that we would give to a favorite best friend... times infinity.

He really is incredible.

Specialness

The other day I was pondering being chosen. I was a little upset by some new person who decided our family was too radical and could have nothing to do with us anymore. I was thinking about it more and more and getting rather depressed by the whole thing. Then I realized that it doesn't really matter if I'm rejected by people on earth because GOD chose me. He really did choose me, because there is no way I could be like this on my own. Sometimes it looks like the people of the world are having more fun and that it's too difficult to follow God, but we should never think that. It is a great privilege to be one of the ones that the Lord uses, and I'm so glad I am one of them.

"But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar...that ye should show forth the praises of Him who hath called you out of darkness into His marvelous light."

A Random Encouragement To You Soldiers

I was pondering the motivation behind why we do things, yesterday. There are so many things we do that we just kind of take for granted. Why do we do all these things? What makes us get up in the morning and work hard and things? What makes us want to keep going? There are so many reasons people come up with for things. So many excuses people give for the lives they choose to pursue.

The only reason it ever can solidly come down to is Jesus. He can be our only motivation. It is evident from the decline of the culture. People have no motivation for anything anymore. The suicide rates are so high. It is because without Jesus, nothing makes sense. There really is no reason for anything without Him. Think about it. There really isn't.

So, when things get tough, when we wonder if this all is meaningless, when we want to give up, when we're faced with unparalleled opposition, just remember that we're doing it all for Jesus. And He's worth living and dying for.

A Deadly Weapon

Oh, how we underestimate the power of prayer! I’ve grown to realize that in the past couple weeks, especially yesterday.

Now, as a normal human, I have many problems. I have problems with friends, my health, how I spend my time, getting along with my family, my mood and all sorts of other things. I’m always trying to solve them too. I talk about them with my mom, read books about how to deal with them, and write out plans with how to conquer them.

But in the past few months I’ve come to see that I can’t solve any of my problems. Sure, I can do things better and I’m not just going to be lazy. But no matter how hard I try to get along with people, I’ll still encounter enemies. No matter how much I try to psyche myself up to be cheerful, I’ll still succumb to the depression. No matter how healthy I eat, I still will get sick.

Joy of all joys, though, there is a King who can settle my problems for me if only I ask Him. For the last couple weeks, the first thing I’ve done as soon as I wake up is pray for God to control my mood and direct my emotions. He amazingly has done just that, and I have been so happy. Not that fake kind of happy you get only when you’re at a party or an amusement park or something, but the lasting joy that you have when you know that everything has a good purpose. I know go to work with a new willingness to serve and now can be perfectly calm in situations that used to stress me out.

No, I’m not perfect. No, I never will be on earth. But things are a lot better for me now that I’m not trying to control my own life, but asking my Maker to do it for me, because only He truly knows what I need.

What would happen if God’s people prayed for the unsaved in this way? What could happen if all the Christians were praying over every area of their lives like this?

What if the armies of the Lord picked up and dusted off their swords,
Vowed to set the captives free and not let Satan have one more?

What if the church, for heaven's sake, finally stepped up to the plate,
Took and stand upon God's promise, and stormed hell's rusty gates?

What if His people prayed and those who bear His name
Would humbly seek His face and turn from their own way?

And what would happen if we prayed for those raised up to lead the way?
Then maybe kids in school could pray and unborn children see light of day

What if the life that we pursue came from a hunger for the truth?
What if the family turned to Jesus and stopped asking Oprah what to do?

He said that they would hear; His promise has been made
He’s answered loud and clear. If only we would pray.

A Much Needed Post (According to Evan)

What excuse do I have to offer for the delay? Well, this computer keyboard makes me mad since the right shift button and the 'e' key are both missing, which makes this a little difficult.

Moving on...

I've given much thought to my own life in the past few days. There were a couple things with people that needed to be worked out in my mind. The thoughts just kind of roll around for a while and I forget about blogging. But it isn't all bad. I figured some good things out.

Now that the explanation is over, I have nothing else to say.

Well, I suppose I can come up with something. Pi is 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939...

So, I was thinking over some of my friendships today and it just occurred to me that I almost stopped going to this one place for events right before I became really good friends with someone there. Things like that really make me see the power of God. I really wonder at all the things I almost missed out on, but turned out so perfect. Someone is watching me and making my life good and that makes me happy.

A Long Story

It was a beautiful spring-like day in early March. She was celebrating her 15th birthday with five of her girl friends with a walk to the park. It was a nice day, but this was not the high point of her life. She and her family were about to move and they had already switched churches. Her parents had divorced two and a half years earlier and her mom remarried a year and a half later. Things were not very peaceful for her. She longed for the day when God would call her home to heaven and could not hope anymore. As far as she could see, the good life for her was coming to an end and she could not help think of all the past friends she had lost that should have been at the party.

(Two weeks later)
She woke up before church feeling a bit odd, so she skipped breakfast. After the service, she stayed sitting and didn't talk to anyone because of the pain in her stomach. As soon as she got home she threw up. She tried eating something then, but couldn't keep anything down, not even water. She wasn't too concerned though, since her mom told her that her friend she had gone rollerskating with on Saturday night had the same sickness.
Now, usually she complained whenever she was sick, a trait which caused her family much anxiety. This time she decided it would be different. She didn't want to cause any more worry. So, she just rested and waited it out.
Monday was no better. She couldn't eat or drink anything. She stayed in bed almost all day, alternately sleeping and listening to Switchfoot's Nothing Is Sound.
Tuesday night after another day of losing everything she tried to eat, she felt miserable. It was the worst she had ever felt. She tried to sleep, but could not because of the severe pain in her stomach. She went downstairs to the couch and lay there writhing in pain. Her mom half kidding, half joking asked "Are you dying?"
"Mom, I'm really not sure." she replied.
The next day she thought she felt better. She still couldn't keep down anything, but the pain subsided a little. Her friend was all better by then. She hoped it wouldn't be long for her. She still slept almost all day, though, as well as the night. Her fever was high.
Thursday morning was a beautiful day, with the sun shining bright through her skylights. She got up out of the bed feeling better, like she was going to be well that day. [gross part] While she was in the bathroom though, she threw up again...and it was green. "Mom, I haven't even eaten anything green!" [/end gross part]
"You haven't eaten anything! Honey, look at your stomach, it's all swollen." She hadn't noticed the swelling. She thought she was just fat, like she always though.
They made plans to go to the doctor on the way to the library. She'd been sick for four days and it was getting a little scary. They were even more scared after the doctor's. After checking her, he cheerfully told her in his Scottish accent "Well, Luv, I think you have appendicitis. You need to go to the emergency room right away."
On the way to the hospital her mom called all their friends to find someone to watch her younger siblings. It seemed like everyone was out though, since it was one in the 60's and only March. No one was missing out on the good weather. Except her, she sat in the car in a sweatshirt and sweatpants, extremely chilled, trying not to be jostled too much on the bumpy road.
Her grandmother met them at the hospital to watch her younger sisters. The emergency room wait was as terrible as everyone says. Her mother said something to her grandmother about how ridiculous it, because her appendix could burst right then while waiting at the hospital. There was no one else around anyway. None of this scared her though; her over tired mind could barely process it. Having her appendix burst and dying didn't seem to bad at the moment though. Anything that would stop the pain was fine with her. After at least two hours of waiting, they finally went into the doctor. After examining her, he told her that he thought it was just the flu and said she could go home. Her mom wouldn't allow that though, so he sent her to the other building to have her checked out by the surgeon.
The surgeon was concerned. Very concerned. The surgeon told her she needed a CAT scan right away. They made her drink this nasty drink to make her insides more visible. It came right back up while she was in the waiting room though. She could barely care, though. She was slipping away.
The CAT scan results were not good. "We can't even find her appendix, her intestines are so swollen," the surgeon told her mom. "It might be Chron's disease. We need to bring her in for exploratory surgery right away." So, she was admitted into the hospital and hooked up to an IV.
While she was lying there in the top floor of the hospital, waiting for them to be ready for her, she thought she was about to die. Really, the pain had taken over so much, that death was a wonderful thought to her. She felt bad for her family though. She didn't want to leave them without her. Her life hadn't been lived the best it could be. She thought of all the times she complained and was ungrateful. If only she could just be alive without the pain now, she'd have no reason to complain.
Most of all though, she thought of God. She closed her eyes and thought of Jesus, her Savior. She was overwhelmed by the fact that she might meet Him that night. The thought filled her with fear. Not fear that she wasn't saved, but just the fear of coming face to face with God. She looked forward to it though and thought it was very appropriate since her life seemed to be winding down.
A couple men came in and wheeled her in her bed down to the surgery room. They gave her something in the IV. She was so exhausted anyway. They were telling her something about what they were doing and what would happen. They asked if she understood. She didn't. She couldn't. She faded away quite peacefully. There was no time to say goodbye to her mom, who was there with her. It was the end, so she thought.


She woke up in a room with bright lights. She could hear voices, talking about her, she thought. Where was she? Why would people be talking about her in her bedroom? How did they all get there? She couldn't remember where she was last night, what she was doing last. She shifted slightly and the pain shot through her stomach and it all came back to her. She was in the hospital with something wrong with her. She thought she was dying. Why was she here then? Her mom rushed in as so as she was fully conscious again. "You're going to be okay. Your appendix has been burst for four days. You'll be alright now."
It was only about ten o'clock when she was settled in her room. They gave her morphine for a pain killer. She tried to sleep, but couldn't stop talking to her mom about it all. She was so relieved. She knew what was wrong with her and she was going to be okay. Her mom told her to sleep, but the adrenalin rushed through her too much. Finally, just before sunrise she drifted off for a couple hours.
That day her siblings and many other people visited. Everyone brought gifts, cards or flowers. Her room was filled with beautiful things. She was thirsty, but they wouldn't give her water. She was still on the IV and had an oxygen tube in her nose as well as a variety of other tubes and chords connecting to her. She felt a little silly, but she was alive. God had saved her. That much was certain. He had a wonderful plan for her now; she had no doubt about that. He saved her life for a great reason, a plan He had for her to still be alive.
There were many complications in the next couple days. She had a bad reaction to the painkillers. She tried to eat after three days, but still couldn't keep it down. The IV irritated her arm when they switched the position. It didn't really matter to her though. She didn't realize anything was wrong, but her mom was concerned. She wasn't healing well. Every day she had to get up and walk around the floor. She could barely walk down the hall. She hugged a hard pillow to her stomach. The nurse told her that the pain was so bad because they had to cut through her stomach muscles. They wheeled her down to the garden one day for her to walk out there, but it exhausted her too much and made the pain worse. Her sisters brought her books in from home, but to her dismay, she couldn't read. Her brain wouldn't focus. She was too tired and the pain killers distorted her mind. One day the doctor came in and, without warning, tore the bandage off her stomach. To her utter horror, her stomach was doubled over and stapled together with fifteen little metal staples. "I didn't know they used STAPLES!" she cried later. The hospital was dull. They brought a TV in and she watched some movies, but after six hours of that, it got boring. She was just happy to be alive. So happy.
Tuesday, she finally was released. Her cousins brought her home in their comfortable car, so she wouldn't be banged around too much. She was happy to be home and hoped to return back to normal. But it couldn't be normal anymore. Her life was a miracle, she now could fully see. When she was lying in the hospital bed that night before the surgery she was dying. She's sure of that. Her life was about to end and with all that happened, she should have. But, God saved her life and that gave her a reason to rejoice everyday of the rest of her life.

Her recovery the next few months was very difficult. She lost fifteen pounds in the week of not eating, which took over six months to gain back. Her stomach was so swollen for at least three months that all she could wear were sweatpants. She missed out on spring because she was too cold to stay outside much. Her stomach still swells sometimes, even two years later, when she's under stress or eats certain foods. She developed intolerance to gluten. All in all though, she wouldn't trade her experience. It changed her whole outlook on life. She can sit now, outside, just watching the birds and the grass swaying in the wind. She loves everything about life now. When before, she felt this drive to succeed at everything and couldn't rest without feeling guilt, she now can be at peace with resting and just enjoying the life her Lord gave her.

Less than a year later she was involved in an online project that brought 10,000 people to its site in the first hour of it's launch. She made friends in the new church and was invited to several graduation parties the next spring. Her next birthday, there were a hundred people with her to celebrate the end of her highschool graduation. She's learning to play guitar and has made even more friends of all ages. She does not mention any of these things to people in order to brag. She says this all as a testimony to God and the wonderful things He has done for her and how He has blessed her by using her for great things.

How do I know so much about this girl? I am her.

Soli Deo gloria,
Katrina

Wow

My life is so good.

I have a wonderful mom, caring dad, and three amazing siblings. I have so much fun with my family, working with them, playing with them and living for God with them. They are my best friends.

God has changed my heart lately and I feel so much of a greater hunger to be closer to Him and follow Him more. It hardly seems like I can read the Bible enough these days and I often find myself turning off the music, so I can pray without distractions. I just love the Lord so much, I don't think I can ever get enough of Him.

I have the most amazing friends ever. Everyone was so good to me for m birthday. Someone called my in the car, during their busy day, while the had a cold, just to wish me a happy birthday and to pray with me. Someone else asked to stay the night so they could come to my party. My cousins gave me tons of flowers (and a ridiculous lamp :P). My family made delicious food on my birthday. Another great friend surprised me by coming forty-five minutes to my party. One family that came to my party brought their infant baby out to it, the first place he ever went to. And two friends from Canada sent me very nice personal cards to me. This is just to name a few things. Everyone is just so good to me, and I'm so glad God has brought them all into my life.

Life is just so amazing for me. God has blessed me so much. I love having all the joys of life. Listening to music, getting fresh air and sunshine, being able to play instruments, having people that care about me, living in a wonderful family, being blessed with a lovely home, and most of all, getting to serve God and tell other people about Him.

Right now I'm so happy to be blessed. The worldly voice in my head tells me this time will end, that I'll have tough times again and not handle them well, but there's some small voice in me that tells me that God would have me this happy all the time, even when things are difficult and things go wrong. With God's strength, the memory of the good times and the hope of Christ will carry me through all the time and I can keep this joy in me always.

Well, I had a really amazing time with a bunch of friends yesterday. I suppose you could call it a party. We hung out and sang songs and cool stuff like that the whole evening. It was a really fun time and made me really really happy. I wish it could be like that all the time. I wish I was always with my friends that are passionate about God, living for Him, and praising Him like I am. Then it dawned on my this afternoon that it'll be like that in heaven. ALL my very best friends will be there all the time and we'll have a giant choir. That makes me even happier.

The Perfect Book

I happen to think the Bible is the most perfect book. Now, that's kind of obvious, but I think a lot of people say that, but don't really believe it. Lots of people think it's boring, that the chronologies and Old Testament law is tedious to read, but I don't think so at all.
The Bible contains the most beautiful poetry, most dramatic battles, depressing lamentations, intriguing mysteries, heartless betrayals, inspiring exhortations, and incomparable romances. I don't know what I'm trying to say anymore. The other day, I was reading the Bible and I told my mom that it's just so perfect and I read a chapter out loud to her to demonstrate. It wasn't a very significant chapter. It was somewhere in Leviticus, I think, but just speaking the words, knowing that it was God's words. Any time I'm feeling depressed (or way too over-excited), when I read the Bible, I feel so much better and relaxed and at peace. It really is amazing.

Birthday Resolutions

So, I turned 17 today. Happy day. Reaching the marking of another year makes me very pensive about my life, what I've done and what I'll continue to do. Will I continue on with the same bad habits or really try to change and grow into who God wants me to be. Well, I'm hoping and praying for the latter. So, this is my list of resolutions, short as it may be.

• I want to make the most of my time at home with my family and really make sure that my family members are my best friends.
  
• I'm determined to put other first and really try to think of myself less.
  
• God will be first in my life. I must pray to Him first every day and read His Word before any other thing.
• I greatly desire to spread the Gospel more and stand up for God more.
  
• Lastly, unimportant as it may seem compared to other things, I'm going to journal and blog more, so as to have a record of my lessons, to hopefully help other people avoid the same mistakes I make.
  

P.S. My mom got me Oh! Gravity. for my birthday.

Lessons of A Girl That's Allergic To Paint

Being sick always teaches me so much about God and life how messed up my priorities are. Add that on top of me being away from home, realizing how much I miss my family.

When everything is going on smoothly with life, when I'm healthy, getting along well with people, going everywhere that I want to, it's easy to just get lost in the normalness of things. Then my unsastified side comes out and just wants more, to be healthier and more productive.

When I get sick though, I think things are always put into much better perspective. Instead of wanting to read novels and facebook wall posts, I'm desperate to read the Bible. Instead of wanting to go on the computer to IM, I have a deep desire to talk to my family. Instead of day dreaming, I pray. Instead of listening the music that talks about the world and it's problems, I am drawn the worship music, that declares the glory of God. In these times, when my health is so fragile, when it really feels like death could happen upon me at any time, I truly see what life is all about, what the God-given deep desires of my soul are.

I spent the night away from home last night. It was a very fun time. But it brought me to see how much I really love my family and that I should really spend more time with them. Sadly, I still did the same things and that there wasn't much missing from my normal routine, which reall showed me how too indivualistic I am. This has to end.

Priorities are easy to see sometimes, but I can never seem to live them out. God, help me to take the lessons I learned while sick in bed and away from home, and really put them into practice and live each day with joy overflowing, doing what's truly important, as if today was the last day I had.

Live

I came across the most amazing song lyrics last night by Nichole Nordeman.

Did You come that we might just survive?
Did You come so we could just get by?
Did You walk among us so we might merely limp along beside?

I was bound, I have been set free
But I have settled for apathy
Did You come to make new
And know I'd crawl right back into the skin You found me in?
It's where I am, not where I've been

You make me want to live
You make me want to live
You came to shake us
And to wake us up to something more
Than we'd always settled for
And You make me want to live

We've all been up on the mountain top
A golden glow that's bound to soon wear off
Then it's back to the mundane, telling tales of glory days
When we were hopeful that this change was here to stay

So why would a young man live in a waste land
When the castle of his dreams is standing by?
Why would a princess put on an old dress
To dance with her beloved and a chance to catch his eye?

This song expresses my feelings so well. I have always wondered at the people who say that we have to come down from our mountain top experiences. I've always thought that to be my own sin that causes me to make life feel monotonous again, not the natural way that God made things. Granted, we will have trials, but we can face them with the strength of God. So often we just wear the "old dress" of this world, when we really don't have to. Life with Christ is just so beautiful that I really want to savor every minute of it and walk with the Lord and truly live.

First Post! --Knowing God

This is my new blog. I decided I needed one separate from my other, for my thoughts, with no pressure. This will be where I put all my short ideas, favorite quotes, random things I like, current events, and song lyrics.

To start off, right now I’m reading Knowing God, by J.I. Packer. I’m only in chapter two, but I’ve already found it to be amazing. Here is a quote from the second chapter:

Nor, I think, would many of us ever naturally say that in the light of the knowledge of God which we have come to enjoy, past disappointments and present heartbreaks, as the world counts heartbreaks, don’t matter. For the plain fact is that to most of us they do matter. We live with them as our “crosses” (so we call them). Constantly we find ourselves slipping into bitterness and apathy and gloom as we reflect on them, which we frequently do. The attitude we show to the world is a sort of dried-up stoicism, miles removed from the “joy unspeakable and full of glory” which Peter took for granted that this readers were displaying (1Peter 1:8 KJV). “Poor souls,” our friends say of us, “how they’ve suffered.” And that is just what we feel about ourselves!

But these private mock heroics have no place at all in the minds of those who really know God. They never brood on might-have-beens; they never think of the things they have missed, only of what they have gained.

"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ," wrote Paul. "What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all thins. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him…I want to know Christ" (Philippians 3:7-10). When Paul says he counts the things he lost rubbish, or dung (KJV), he means not merely that he does not think of them as having any value, but also that he does not live with them constantly in his mind: what normal person spends his time nostalgically dreaming of manure? Yet this, in effect, is what many of us do. It shows how little we have in the way of true knowledge of God.

How true that is! I am now greatly looking forward to getting to know God more.